42 Years + 4 Years + 18 Paintings

A birthday, a soberversary, and a series of paintings to celebrate

Me holding Desmond on my first day of sobriety + 38th birthday.

On June 21st (also the summer solstice!) I turn 42 and reach 4 years of sobriety (the photo above is on my first day of sobriety). Last year around this time, I wrote a similar post—looking back at the year and taking stock.

In June 2023, I was embarking on a journey to a place where I wanted to heal.

41 years + 3 years

In some ways, it was healing. In others, there are still tender spots. The best part of the trip was that I felt worthy enough to go somewhere I previously would have felt ashamed and rejected. I faced one of my greatest fears and I have no regrets.

The experience symbolized a theme that has continued throughout my 41st year of life.

The simplest way to put it is: I am OK with who I am and what I have to offer at this moment. This is very different from: I am OK with who I am when I’m as prepared as humanly possible and ready to do/say whatever is needed to make things go smoothly.

Silence is OK, disappointment is OK, surprises are OK, awkwardness is OK. And oftentimes there are delightful and unexpected joys that arise from surrendering to what is (surrender also happens to be my word of the year).

In honor of imperfection and surrender, I’m sharing 18 paintings from my recent color experiments.

They represent what I want to continue to do in my 42nd year of life—let go, be curious, and experience joy.

xo, Corinne

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